Bragging Rights

The Apostle Paul says I have something to brag about…OK…He has my attention.  Paul starts in 2 Corinthians 11 by saying that he, like the people in the Church at Corinth, could very well be a “fool” and boast in all kinds of things that might in turn make him look better in their eyes.  However, he says, “I will boast all the more gladly in my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in my weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 

As you read through the first and second letter to the Corinthians, you get the feeling that the people of that church gave Paul plenty of reason to “delight in weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions and difficulties.”  The church was not only openly engaged in sexual sin, drunkenness, gluttony, social-economic prejudice and more, but they had also falsely accused the motives and actions of Paul.  It takes two letters to address it all.  When he finally reaches his end (probably in more ways than one) he tells them about a personal encounter he had with Christ that changed everything for him.  Three times he prayed for the Lord to remove the thorn in his flesh.  Many scholars speculate about what his “thorn in the flesh” was (e.g. was his thorn a personal struggle, a physical ailment, a spouse, the church in Corinth….?) but all admit we will never know.  But for Paul the point is not the specific nature of his thorn, but what Jesus revealed to him through it: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” And having stated that revelation, Paul then moves on to assume bragging rights about his weaknesses!

These words from Paul (2 Corinthians 12:9-10) are what I believe I have been led to embrace as my verse of meditation for transformation for 2015.  I can tell you at this point that the more I seek the Spirit as I read this verse each day, the more I realize that I have yet but tapped its surface.  What I can tell you now is that I AM WEAK.  Just in case you have not figured it out by now, you need to know that you have a very weak Pastor. 

Paul is teaching me not to look down when I admit that but to look up!  I am to say, “I am weak,” and look up in my spirit to such an extent that I actually “delight in my weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties.”  To be honest, I have always been extremely hard on myself.  My parents use to say that they really did not have to discipline me very harshly because by the time my shortcomings got to them I had already given myself a whipping so to speak.  So, I know how to look down in my weaknesses, but how do I delight in them?

I also am really good at looking down when insults come my way.  I was an extremely shy child growing up.  I can recall one of my teachers telling me and my Mom that “Chad will never be able to reach his potential because his shyness will always hold him back.”  I took that to heart for a good long time.  I spent my teenage years trying to hide in the shadows, but all it seemed to do was accentuate that I was different enough to be made fun of by our local school bullies.  Back then we did not know that bullying was not supposed to be the normal lot of life for a select few, so I would just take it looking down.

I am also prone to looking down in discouragement in hardships and difficulties.  I can remember when God called me into ministry when I was 14 years old.  I could not believe God would call a shy kid like me who teachers said would never amount to anything.  But way back then, I made a decision to believe what God saw could be in me rather than what people saw in me.  Looking back…it is amazing to see how God’s truth about his view of me literally changed my world.  The passion he put in me to prepare myself for ministry and the vision he began to give me for the kind of Pastor he was calling me to be still leaves me without words of description.  But then I began to Pastor and I realized that while MVNU and NTS taught me so much about Biblical exegesis, it prepared me little for the hardships and difficulties of ministry (That is no fault to MVNU and NTS because the truth is only experience can teach that lesson).  I know I am not alone in this as I have watched many (I would venture to say a majority, but without having proof will not state that for sure) of my friends who started in ministry at the same time as I, are now no longer in “ministry.”  I often think of how these “wounded soldiers” are the ones people in the church love to shake their heads and talk about as if they have any idea what it is like to try to Pastor any church these days.  The level of hostility, unrealistic expectations, pressure to perform and consumption with pettiness is simply something that at times, frankly, has just about brought me to leave ministry.  Needless to say, I have a lot to learn about delighting in hardships and difficulties.

Finally, I know full well how to flinch and run from persecution.  First of all, I think very few US citizens have any right to “brag” about persecution. I think of our friend and sister in Christ, Naghmeh Abedini, whose husband, Pastor Saeed, has been imprisoned and beaten in Iran for two years—that is persecution.  But nevertheless, whatever its form, Jesus let us know in advance that the student is not above the teacher and so all who follow him will face persecution of some kind and degree.  Again, how do we delight in that?

Well, as you can tell I have a lot to learn from this verse for 2015.  You might even want to throw your own two cents my way about just how much more I have to learn.  But one thing I have already been learning to appropriate is to take the first step.  I truly believe the Bible says this is the first step for anyone who wants to experience Jesus’ “power made perfect in our weakness” and that is to admit, “I am weak.”  So, CFNaz family, “I am weak.”  I have not yet learned how to delight in my weakness, in insults, in hardships or in difficulties, but something tells me that God has brought me to the perfect time and place for which I can learn. 

Truthfully, I am little afraid.  What it takes to learn this truth does not exactly sound fun.  But on the other hand, I have this surge of hope filling me this year.  How loved by God I am that he would want me to learn his power in my weakness! Wow!  Now that is something to brag about!